Product rave: The Make Up Store Wonder Powder

This is something i've been wanting to purchase for a long time and finally dropped 40 euros on..sigh. It is truly an amazing product and i'm surprised that Makeupalley.com doesn't even have this brand listed when they're more or less present in every major country. The Make Up Store is a highly popular Swedish makeup brand founded in 1996 which is currently taking over large chunks of the market. I am one of the ones that have been recently 'converted', not necessarily to the entire range of products but surely to a few ones. This mineral powder's name completely does it justice- it is an amazing, wonderful product. It works and looks like a combination of powder, illuminator and foundation. It comes in four shades and i am currently using the darkest one which is much lighter than any bronzer i own; i purchased the darkest tone because of the summer that is going to come soon- the quantity in the jar lasts for quite a while (19 grams or 0.67 fluid ounces).



I heard about this product while reading one of Sweden's most popular beauty blogs; the author swore by it and i had been indeed inquiring about the 'glow from within' complexion so many Swedish girls are sporting. It is not glitter, it is not pearly white sheen, it is something amazing that i could never find, no matter how many illuminators i have tried. I remember my most favorite was the Revlon Skin Lights Face Illuminator, i had both the powder and the liquid version but it still wasn't the same. First of all, there was the glitter inside. I didn't even know what i was looking for but it was definitely not something with too much glitter or shimmer. Second, the limited choice of colors and use- the Revlon illuminator was just an illuminator that became hard to work with, mix with the foundation or apply afterwards. It did not blend in properly and i remember i ended up throwing the tube with the liquid. I kept the powder though for summer nights bronzed goddess look.

However. When i read about this product, as i mentioned in the beginning of this post, i couldn't help at going straight to the store the next day and trying all shades. This is what mine looks like, in Gobi. First picture with flash:



And without flash (lamp light, it's already dark outside but i couldn't wait any longer to blog about this):



aaaaand this is a sort of depiction of what it looks like on my skin (wrist). Unfortunately the artificial light doesn't bring out the entire effect of the powder. Without flash:



with flash:



I love the incredibly delicate finish that indeed looks like the skin is glowing from the inside. The application is a bit tricky. When the SA tried to show me how to apply it i thought she was taking me for an idiot and that i most certainly didn't need how to 'learn' swirling some powder on. Big mistake- it is indeed a tricky product. To get the best of it you need the smallest quantity, because it is very buildable; it doesn't show any skin pores or fine lines either, which is great. The SA recommended a synthetic kabuki or powder brush, because soft natural bristles would pick too much product. The key of a successful application is picking up the tiniest amount of product and really working it into the skin. The swirling and gentle rubbing help the powder release the glow; i thought she was kidding and when i got home i washed my face to apply new makeup for a night out; swirled it across my cheekbones and nothing. The effect was that of a simple powder-bronzer, nothing close to the beautiful glow the powder gave me when the SA applied it. And i took her advice and boom. Instant glamazon in the mirror. I love it and couldn't live without it. I actually wonder if this stuff was some well kept secret or something...i should have heard of it by now.

The other shades it comes in are Sahara, the lightest, almost 100% pure illuminator, Kalahari, which perfectly mimics the naturally pale Scandinavian complexion, so it can be used as foundation by someone with a light skin tone or illuminator if you're wearing a darker foundation or have a naturally darker complexion, Gobi, the one that i have, a tad darker than my natural skintone but amazingly pigmented and not orange or terracotta-like at all, no redness, just a deep rich dark beige with champagne undertones, and Sinai, the darkest of them all, which was not available at the store where i made my purchase. The Gobi shade is perfect for light complexions when slightly tanned or even darker complexions. It is a rather chameleonic shade, fitting every skintone.

I find that it works best if i let the moisturizer completely sink in, especially if i am using it as foundation only, without anything underneath. it covers really well and gives the skin a healthy, summery glow that doesn't look fake at all, but i have to be attentive, as i said, to leave my moisturizer sink in otherwise it can look a little patchy. With this stuff you MUST have a very light hand and slowly build it up, just like with any other mineral powder/foundation. It contains titanium dioxide so it provides a mild SPF which is another plus for me.
I think i am going to purchase the Kalahari shade as well, to use it separately or mix it with other powders and bronzers i have. I am completely in love.

ps Tomorrow morning i am posting pics with the Wonder Powder on! Yay!

Soda cans are the new hair rollers

Both Ashley Olsen and Lady Gaga are sporting the 'tin curlers' hair. I won't even bother commenting on Lady Gaga's style because it would be an unnecessary pain. However, i couldn't help at wonder what the hell was she thinking when engaging in an Ashley Olsen copycat for her Telephone video...or song, single or whatever. I just saw the photos and felt really sad for Lady Gaga. If all you've gotta do is wear fake blood, plastic gowns, telephones on your head and hamster ball 'dresses' to get attention, then that's bad but at least your mission is accomplished. If you MUST steal someone else's idea and brand it as yours, then it's pretty obvious you're lame.

Ashely Olsen in Marie Claire, photographed by Ruven Afanador:





Lady Gaga in her latest video:



Of course, it's not even worth mentioning that Ashley's Marie Claire photo shoot hit the stands way before Gaga's song was even recorded, not to mention filming the video.

Team Ashley here. Girlfriend at least rocks fabric, not recyclable pieces of plastic.

Fashion fisticuffs- Eva Longoria

Eva Longoria is one of my favorite actresses and a (naturally) beautiful beautiful woman. I've been watching Desperate Housewives more or less for the single purpose of following Gabrielle, her style and her personality, a sort of 'what is she up to now'. I love that Eva the actress is not cosmetically altered like most of the Hollywood beauties, i love her huge contagious smile, her openness and honesty in interviews, i love that she has a husband, not five, and that they look gorgeous together, i love that she's a charitable celebrity who doesn't make a fuss about it...and the list goes on. Her makeup in the D.H. series is always flawless and dramatic and there are even a bunch of Eva Longoria inspired makeup videos on YT, i think i watched those at least a dozen times each. (I love her natural looks so much that I got myself a pair of brown contact lenses to try and emulate the 'Gabrielle eyes' as much as possible...)
Since i'm in my post-Oscar fashion mood i decided to blog about my favorite and least favorite of Eva's outfits, and of course, about the makeup. I'm a makeup geek myself and while really loving some of Eva's looks, i equally dread others...total 'sack the makeup artist' situations. Sigh.

The clean and fresh look is one of my favorites:



It's hard to even see the foundation, the eyebrows are naturally filled in (take notes, Kim K...) and frame her face in a youthful way, and i also love the nude pinkish-lavender lips. No Lady Gaga caked lilac-yellow teeth combo, no Lindsay Lohan Barbie bubblegum pink. Just natural and clean. I absolutely love this look on her, as minimalistic as possible even at a posh event:



I can honestly see ONLY eyeliner and mascara, or potentially false lashes. Not a drop of self tanner or tacky bronzer. Beautiful and clean. I love the hair as well, very spring nymph look. I also like this look:



A little bit of drama on the eyelashes and that's it. While not being generally crazy about the slight platitude Eva's makeup always displays, in theoretical terms- emphasis on the eyes, nude lips- i have to recognize that not many people can pull the same makeup style all the time and still look gorgeous with just a little definition.
I did not like the 'blond' period at all, it was more of an Kim Kardashian-sort of thing and i really think it didn't suit Eva as nicely as brunette locks do. But even with the 'beige' hair, the makeup in this photo is amazing, flawless, and whoever did it deserves a serious raise:



My favorite Eva makeup and hair of all times:



This is an evening makeup with a little bit of added drama- the false lashes, a tad of bronzing powder and the blusher. The hair is gorgeous, and the cheeks look like two ripe apples. I also like the demure lipstick, not beige, not lilac, not pink, but a naturally blushed pink that compliments both the rest of the makeup and her natural skintone. The key of this look is the complexion-perfectly clean canvas, naturally matte yet glowing with youthfulness. REALLY gorgeous. Another pic of the same makeup and hair (i love love love love LOVE it!!!):



I also love this other look, particularly 'jazzy' because of the peachy blush and the soft, out-of-bed hair waves:



The outfit is also cool because the large turquoise earrings go so well with the plain white shirt and create this classy with a hint of color look. Zuper.

Here's one for a change- Eva with glossy raspberry pink lips and Grecian goddess hair (love the coral dress too. I think it's from an Emmy Awards Ceremony...):



I cropped Eva because next to her was Fergie, with her fergaliciously tattooed eyebrows, but come to thinking i could have let her in the frame so the effect would be even more striking. Aaaanyways. Eva's complexion is much paler than usual and the cheekbones have a fresh glow, looking delicious. Give it up for amazing hair and lovely pink lips (a little bit of eyelash overreaction but the rest of the makeup is great):



I like that Eva is beautiful even without any trace of makeup on and paradoxically, her eyes look larger with no falsies or mascara on:



Now there come the misfits. This makeup style is right on the edge:



I like the lipstick, the dramatic yet tasteful eye makeup but there has been a little foundation excess, especially under the eyes and on the forehead. Also, the complexion is too light in those areas, and the line between the paleness and the rest of the face is quite visible. Sigh.
During and post- light hair era Eva's eyebrows have been bleached and tinted in a weird shade of orangey beige that somehow managed to stay on even after she went back to her darker roots:



The eyebrows are too filled in, the crayon or powder line being very visible and the navy eye liner just doesn't look good on her (same for the silver lining). It was supposed to match the dress but it ended up not matching the face. I particularly dislike these makeup looks:








Why keep the bleached eyebrows when your hair is dark again? Beats me. Also, in the second pic her makeup looks dry,worn out and ages her like crazy. In the first and third pics the foundation is so clearly visible, so caked up on the cheeks and the nose, i'm wondering what brand was it so i know never purchase it. Just fake and gunky; no more glowing complexion, no more cleanness, just the need for soap and water. It's less gunky in this pic but still visible and just too light:



Well the theory has been proven. With full face makeup but no dramatic eyes or lashes the entire look just doesn't appear right. Eva looks old, tired and cranky, especially with the thinned bleached eyebrows. Double sigh. The makeup artist should have been fired on the spot.
Nevertheless, nothing compares to this:





OH NO. I know it's been a long time but i still can't get over it. I hope the person responsible for this was given tar and feathers, chased out of Hollywood for good and his name put down on every celebrity black list Roledex in the US...in the world!!...oh my goodness. What a disaster. I guess the picture pretty much speaks for itself but however, i shall dwell on it once again just for the sake of it. The photos are taken with different light intensities so the horror is visible in two specters, one orangey, that reminds us all of Paris Hilton, and a darker one that makes Eva look like an ashy face-painted memory of herself. First of all, the octopus on her head is orange. Her face is orange except for the undereye area, that's completely white and wrinkled up. The eyebrows are orange, and the lip liner is orange. The kajal on her lids is WAAAY too thick and almost touches the base of her nose if you look carefully. The lashes look like they've been rescued from a Wal-Mart dumpster, covered in thirteen layers of drugstore cake mascara and attached with another thirteen layers of black glue, just to make sure. What i simply can't get over AT ALL is the bronzer- why did the use shimmer all over her face, and why did the cover THE ENTIRE nose in it? Eva looks like having burnt her face in the spur of the preparations moment. Why didn't she look in a mirror first? and what products did the makeup butcher use? it would be good to know...just in case. That concealer must have a ton of light reflecting particles if it shines like that. Brrr. Downright scary.

Moving on to the outfits, I made a little top of my own. These are my favorite pieces:

1) The polka dots dress



I think this is Eva's most beautiful event dress ever because it has an eclecticism of its own. The timeless pattern goes so well with the youthful and daring cleavage cut, leaving a certain simplicity to the entire outfit. The length is perfect, i like that the lower part is neither straight and sad or bouffant and cupcake-ish. Classic and sophisticated yet giving her a playful Minnie Mouse air. Love the hair, a messy Dita von Teese bun, and the jewelry. The most adorable detail-the red shoes that give that hint of color without being too much.

2) THE red dress





Gorgeous cut that advantages Eva's petite frame, gorgeous color, the neck detail is very Veronica Lake, as are the hair and jewelry. The makeup looks a bit yellow but with a dress like that, nothing else matters.

3) (one of) The white dress(es)



Very ballerina-like, the white is not too white and the shoes are to die for. The belt can appear like too much but has a gorgeous pattern and gives the entire outfit a hint of sparkle.

4) The navy blue dress



Elegant and glamorous. I remember Eva was on the 'best dressed' lists in the major fashion magazines with this dress. Looks very flattering on her body because she is slim, therefore the slender waist+ tasteful cleavage= score score score.

5) The peacock





I don't know neither care if Eva was slammed because of sporting peacock feathers on her dress. Who cares? It looks fantastic! I love the originality, the deep yet fresh green, the way it compliments the hair, the shortness of it, the bleached hair ends...Eva rocks it like a brunette Debbie Harry. You go girl!

6) The glittery biscuit



This is what both Jackie Onassis and Joan Collins would chose to wear if they lived inside the same body. Love the simplicity of the model, the long sleeves on a short dress and the glitter particles. Swept back straight shiny hair= the best choice for this kind of outfit. Eva rocks.

7) The little glittery dress



This might not be the most inspired dress model of them all but i love the fabric and the sexy yet classy cleavage. The 'serious' hair goes great with this sparkling ensemble. Love the purse and the shoes as well. BEAUTIFUL.

8) The turquoise dress



Flowing and elegant, love the bold color that goes perfectly with her natural complexion.

9) The pink lilac dress



Makes me think of spring flowers and the spring break. Lovely youthful color that suits her complexion, the simple detail of the mildly pleaded material singles this dress out.

10) The Marchesa ribbon dress



Forget about the makeup, the hair and the shoes. This dress deserves a parade. It's glamorous and just a liiiiittle too much, which is exactly what a red carpet dress should be like.


Here come my least favorite outfits/gowns Eva sported at events or other occasions. I hope i never make this kind of mistakes...

1) The bad white dress



This is a disaster. The dress looks like an oversized tutu and it just doesn't match Eva's petite body. The hair is stolen from some French matron from the '50's and the chest details...complete disaster. The half-sliced halter design is something Dennis Rodman would sport, together with the tutu...i don't like the veil-halter top combo, it's too Madonna in the '80's. Just wrong.

2) The coral dress



Oh no. No no no no no. What an eye sore. The color is too dusty and washed off to begin with. Eva looks adorable in light pinks and corals but not THIS shade. It's matte, light but...lifeless. Like a sick sort of coral. And the dress cut, who came up with that idea? it's just awful, looks like a wild west madame dress! it ages Eva a lot and the plastic detail bearing the 'embroidered' necklace/chest decorations is a BAD idea.

3) The pink-n-red



two glittery rags sewn together. the colors don't match. the entire ensemble is a joke. the not-so-funny part is the fact that Eva wore this at an event, IN PUBLIC. and even allowed to be photographed in it.

4) The bad red dress



Hm. Mm mm. Uhm. Someone popped in straight from her cha-cha classes, without having had time to take the dress off or wash her hair either. what's with the shoulder detail, i'm not getting it. been looking at this photo for about 14 minutes and i still can't figure it out. what was Eva thinking???

5) The pink dress



-the makeup is pale and chalky and Eva's eyebrows aren't even visible. Lady Gaga's lipstick should be left aside except for Halloween only
-the hair is crunchy, 1994 MTV vj style kind of thing. sweaty,sticky and icky.
-the most distasteful cleavage i have ever seen on Eva, who is usually a sexy yet refined presence. i don't know what happened to her that day.
-beads on the boobs??? wtf?
-i like the clutch...though.

6) The silver dress



The Oversized Coffee Filter-Veil-Rose Shoulder Detail Dress.

7) The wrong red dress



I'm sorry but the cut and length make Eva look even shorter and her body appear heavy. The hair is just bad and the makeup, ugly. Where's the jewelry? or maybe the dress would look even more awful with a bunch of glitzy pieces. why would anyone wear something made of wrinkled satin lining or wrinkled old wannabe-satin bedsheets?

8) Another white dress



The white is too white and looks artificial, like Eva is trying too much. The design of the dress is simple and elegant but the shine of the material emphasizes the cuts and lines, giving it an unnatural sort of stiffness. The ribbon detail isn't inspired at all because it's uneven and a little messy in the first place. the dress could have at least saved face if it didn't have the ribbon or the strap. one or the other, not both. just..wrong. and the hair is way too housewife-ish. nope.

9) The purple dress



Let's make one thing clear, i like the design. I also like the color...in a sort of way. I like the ruffles, i like the length, i even like the puffiness. It's a nice dress, nothing spectacular. It could have been, if the color was a little bit brighter (pretty much a Vera Farmiga sort of act, that would have been gorgeous). But the aubergine tone of the dress makes it a little too dark and sad, to me it gives the impression of a Spanish noblewoman's attire at a 16th century caudillo funeral. Brrr. a little creepy. and another major flaw of the dress- it's too big for Eva's frame. she looks lost inside of it, almost swimming. maybe it's the angle of the picture, but a red carpet dress should look impeccable from any perspective. sigh.

10) The feather duster dress



I don't know if this is a proper feather duster, because it's not properly fluffy on the edges, or a soubrette's dress. a tired soubrette with bad makeup i should say. again, i can't figure out what was she thinking. it's revolving, cheap, looks like a feathered rag.

Fashion fisticuffs- the Oscars

THEY'RE HERE, THEY'RE HERE! The Oscar dresses are here! while my favorite GoFugYourself is preparing its weekend dose of fashion mayhem thus being currently in full creative process i decided to give it a try on my own little blog. Drums drums drums...

The beautiful ones:

1) Sarah Jessica Parker in Chanel



Many fashion magazines have categorized this dress as a little on the fashion mayhem verge because of its unusual, straight cut and the rose detail. I find it absolutely stunning. It is very difficult for someone to look good in a dress like this because the large flowing material does not advantage all body types. But Sarah Jessica Parker can definitely pull it due to her petite frame. I love the satin, the pale golden-beige color, the suspended neck band instead of jewelry, the gray choice for the rose bouquet detail, the hair and the earrings. The cherry on the cake- the bangles. Absolutely unexpected jewelry choice that i think is astonishing. I'm going to keep this picture in my computer forever and ever in the hopes that one day some clever seamstress will manage to recreate this for me....oh the love! the splendor!


2) Kate Winslet in Yves Saint Laurent



I'm crazy about the squared angles of the corset and the necklace. The rectangular shape of the stone, the delicate thread of gold (or whatever that is) and the simplicity of the entire piece makes it just gorgeous. I love Kate's radiantly fresh complexion and the Lauren Bacall-esque hair gives her the '50's diva look. Love the lipstick as well, balances out the nude color of the dress. I'm not particularly crazy about the lower part of the gown, it could have been less delimited at the waist and look less like a long skirt, but the color choice downplays absolutely all the potential misfits. Love the elegant purse, not too big, not too tacky and small, but i would have really adored this ensemble if the dress didn't have the obvious front cut. And it's not that i dislike the shoes, but this kind of dress gives the impression it would really be striking if it covered everything and floated on the red carpet...


3) Elizabeth Banks in Versace



Elegant, delicate, a floating foam of a dress. The color in itself is not particularly beautiful, nor is the chest detail, but the baby blue-gray compliments EBanks' pale rosy skintone and gives the impression of a porcelain doll strolling down the red carpet. Love the hairstyle and jewelry choice, simple and extremely tasteful. 5 stars.


4) Amanda Seyfried in Armani



The former Mean Girl has indeed changed in terms of displaying an utter lack of even the tiniest drop of self-tanner. This celestial, almost bridal gown would look ridiculous on someone with Lindsay Lohan's orange-ness, for that matter. I love how the color of the dress compliments her pale complexion and the classiness of the hair do. I don't like the hippie handicraft bangle though, but this dress can definitely back up ANYTHING.


5) Helen Mirren in Badgley Mischka



I listed Helen because she is one of the most beautiful mature actresses in Hollywood and definitely the classiest. I am not crazy about the cut of the dress because the covered shoulders and the squared cleavage reek of grandma-ness, and it definitely doesn't suit Helen. But i absolutely adore her platinum blonde silver-ish hair and the sophisticated yet simple do. I like the large necklace as well, as i like the color of the dress and the large sparkles embedded in the fabric. Give a terribly youthful lift from the cookie-baking grandma cleavage design. Helen's makeup is impeccable, as usual, and her skin is positively glowing. A-amazing.

6) Vera Farmiga in Marchesa



Beautiful electric color that pops out in a youthful jazzy kind of way; the cut is absolutely fantastic and bold without spilling over the entire Lady Gaga scary monstrosity and the lipstick choice is definitely five stars- it doesn't look too much at all but it compliments Vera's pale complexion. I'm not crazy about the hair but with this kind of dress, playing low it's the best option. Thumbs up, class all the way. Loves it.

7) Diane Kruger in Chanel





I somehow love this dress. It looks like a giant slice of cake with loads and loads or cream and liquorish frosting but i really like it. It's again the Chanel signature pattern, making an astonishing gown in two colors only (neutrals this time, even lovelier) with a catchy and special design. I like the ribbon details on the back and the long satiny strings coming down to her hips. It has a theoretically simple design, being nothing more than a halter cocktail dress, but the ruffled pattern from the waist down is tasteful yet en vogue at the same time. A very eclectic design with gorgeous colors that perfectly suit Diane's skintone...and i also love her hair, simple and clean. The clutch is black and not cream, giving the entire outfit another point for minimalism. Diane looks like a beautiful Cinderella whose dreams are about to come true because Chanel spotted her while standing on the corner near the Beverly Center, selling newspapers, grabbed her delicious frame, put her in this gown and set her afloat on the red carpet. I think not everybody can pull up this look because you need that je ne sais quoi, that personality your dress will borrow, either attitude or grace, and Diane is undoubtedly a graceful presence.

The bad and the ugly:

1) Mariah Carey in Valentino



Okay someone must let Mimi know she's not at the 1994 Chattanooga High prom dance. The dress is first of all very similar to Gabourey Sidibe's. Then that color is NOT for the red carpet but for a '60's soviet flight attendant's uniform if you ask me. The horrendous 'jewelry' looks like something Madonna wore in the '80's 'Desperately Seeking Susan'. And the entire cut is just wrong, the lower front part is way too short and disrupts the entire appearance of a dress i'd otherwise dub as 'not a total eye sore'. It looks as if the seamstress didn't take the correct measurements and 5 minutes before the Oscars ceremony realized the front part is too short so decided to pin it up with her highschool beret broach. Eew.


2) Gabourey Sidibe in Marchesa



Say what??? ok i get it, nobody's gonna talk about the pink elephant in the room so i might as well be the first one. I am amazed that Perez Hilton thinks Gabourey looks 'amazing' in this..thing, and other fashion magazines dubbed the actress as 'stunningly looking'. First of all, the color choice is completely uninspired, more or less like Mariah Carey's. It doesn't go well with Gabourey's skintone, bringing out ashy undertones in her complexion. Secondly, the cut of the dress is definitely NOT suited for overweight-ness. I'm sorry if i can't be cosmetically-correct and refer to miss Sidibe as to 'a delicate feather' because she just isn't. Her body structure is extremely heavy and this dress choice doesn't advantage her at all. The fabric seems to have been washed over a thousand times because that color looks so tired, washed off and just irritatingly sad. Gabourey would have looked a thousand times better in something more appropriate for her body type and a nicer, livelier color. Her hair is also a disaster- Gabourey is a mature woman on a special night on the red carpet, not a 13 year-old on her pediatrician's visit. The bundled up fringe and the swept back unwashed hair just don't do her justice, making her face appear even rounder.


3) Miley Cyrus in Jenny Packham



It appears that nobody noticed Miley left the house wearing only the lower part of a nightgown and a bustier. The horrendous detail of the bustier, namely that puffy fluffy easter bunny lining of the cups is COMPLETELY inappropriate for Miley's age, not to mention tacky and cheap looking. It's like someone from her entourage ripped the fabric off an old prom dress and squeezed Miley in. Tisk tisk tisk. Definite no-no. I also hate the unwashed mohican hair do. Miley Cyrus has definitely grown up...in the wrong way this time.

4) Cameron Diaz in Oascar de la Renta



I have a love-hate relationship with this dress and with Cameron's overall appearance. While hating the lack of jewelry and the red lipstick on the paleness of her face, i like some of the details embroidered on the dress, the bold glitzy golden choice for the sewn details and the draped bottom of the dress.....i like the hair as well. It finally looks like Cameron has met the shampoo bottle. Howeverrrr...i don't like the fact that the overall impression this dress gives at a first glance is that it's been made from an old Studio 54 curtain and the pieces were sewn together 14 minutes before the ceremony. I mean it has no shape (simple is not always classy, Cameron!), no interesting detail and the color is just too floppy. This kind of dress should have been accessorized with some jewelry...or at least a more sophisticated hair do, like a majestic bun or something, you understand what i mean. Then another thing- i always get the feeling that Cameron Diaz looks well only in dresses that mirror extremes- either a surf-inspired chiffon pattern with a pashmina as a belt and fluorescent plastic bangles or long black chiffon gowns styled with pearls. She just has too much attitude to sport such a Cinderella gown and it really comes through, one can tell Cameron is somewhere in there, stuffed inside a glittery dress with some extensions on her head. It's just not her. And the makeup is boring (pale face and red lipstick looks good on pale-skinned people most of the times...), no blush, no nothing, just a neutral washed off tan. Uhm. I really don't like it. I've seen her glow in much prettier outfits (even jeans an a cotton tank top would work better than this dress, though it's a nice piece).

5) Demi Moore in Versace



Oh Demi. This is not an Oscars gown. You look too thin to even sport bare shoulders first of all. Your makeup is nonexistent (or looks like it, at least), your face and hair look like you just came back home after a long day of spinning, jogging and playing volleyball on the beach....or from the gym, your pick. This is a salsa club dress you wear when you go out with your friends to shake things up a little and dance your ruffled chiffon off. This is NOT glamor, it screams Cancun's Coco Bongo too much. A positive aspect is that the cognac of the dress blends in perfectly with the unhealthy fake tan. It looks like the ruffles on your legs are your real skin wrinkling and shriveling and falling off your eternally youthful body. So you could probably get in the DVD exercise industry much easier with this dress...if you want to. Seriously.

6) Rachel McAdams in Elie Saab



Imagine Neytiri from Avatar got on planet Earth. This is what she would look like if suffering from a skin infection and wearing someone's old kitchen curtains as a dress. I really don't understand how could Elie Saab create this kind of disaster and how could someone wear it.

7) Elisabetta Canalis in God knows what



Elisabetta is in a desperate need for three things to look at least decent: a shampoo bottle, a hair brush and A BRA, FOR GOD'S SAKE!! she might also want to consider a TV guide subscription so she'd learn that Baywatch is no longer on air for quite a long time so that extremely tasteful tattoo would look much better under twelve layers of industrial strength concealer. Oh and the dress- i don't like the color, the cleavage is way too low and i'm sure the entire ensemble will successfully help her blend in perfectly with the chair paddings.

8) Penelope Cruz in Donna Karan



In 1980's Eastern Europe the epitome of interior design sophistication was considered to be having thick burgundy drapes on your windows. It is no longer the case of course, but Penelope looks like she's wearing one of the discarded pieces. The iron curtain has fallen quite a while ago, bb. Move on.

9) Jennifer Lopez in Armani



I think J.Lo went to her Wal-Mart from the block, got herself some bubble wrap and decided to wear it by twisting it around herself and making a nice ribbon on the left side. It didn't work out because the wrap curled and flattened out so J.Lo was left with some fluffy waves. Sigh. The earrings scream 'secretary at the company's Christmas party' and what's with the hair? is she getting bald or did she chop it off? good luck next time, J.Lo. I'm a big fan of hers but this time it's a one step for J.Lo, a giant leap for the fug.

10) Nicole Richie in Reem Acra



Uhm. I don't mean to be mean (hehe...) but Nicole totally looks like a malnourished kid whom Madonna has grabbed and wrapped in the first warm thing she could get, namely an old psychedelic wannabe-classy blanket with golden threads her grandma knitted once upon a time. Nicole's tiny little frame looks way bundled up for the LA weather forecast of the past three hundred years and the looseness of the dress doesn't help either. It's like a Woodstock songstress was teleported in Beverly Hills after someone washed her hair and reminded her to pose nicely and not flash the middle finger for the Vietnam or John Lennon cause...you get my point. I really don't like the color choice, Nicole's complexion would have glowed in a stronger and more youthful color, and the fabric looks too thick at the most superficial look. Like a combo between a fashionable Eskimo and one of Charlie Manson's ex lovers. Brrr. And for pete's sake, Nicole, eat a burger!

11) Virginia Madsen in something



Okay honey we need to talk. It's highly probable the night before the ceremony you fell asleep on your couch watching North and South and somehow in your sleep, you managed to communicate your desires and inspiration to your assistant who ran to the closest bridal shop (in the middle of the night, of course), broke the window, picked up the first gown, came back running, threw it in the washing machine together with some black dye and in the morning you had a new, all wrinkled black bridal gown ready to bewilder the red carpet. No no no, honey. It doesn't work like that. The upper part of the dress DOES look like a late '80's bride's blackened gown, and the lower part is a total disaster, like a southern belle's puffy skirt with lace applications...or a Louisiana mansion curtain set? I can't decide.
...and what's with the bangs? and the powdered makeup? and the pale burgundish-pink lipstick? and THE BELT? holy crap, i almost forgot about that.
seriously Vinny. sack the stylist. you're a beautiful woman with a gorgeous body and amazing hair and everything and you pull up that Paula Abdul-in-the-cartoon-music-video look...i'm disappointed. completely.